No worries, mama.

      The past two days I've felt lucky to have the kept the kids alive and survived myself.

I can't tell if it's getting a little easier with both babies at the age they are 

...or if I'm just telling myself stories. 

One and three years.

We've had one wonderful year with this beautiful baby! She loves to be in the middle of it all. While we shopped today for birthday decorations, she screamed throughout the whole store. 

Not because she was mad or fussy. 

She was excited!  

I'm so thrilled that both babies have such strong personalities. 

...Which leads me to tell you that they're both 

Capricorns and yes, I definitely did my reading.

Things like "Capricorns carry the great strength of willingness to work hard and determination to succeed." and "Their ambition is boundless." 

...I'll take it.

Regardless of the things we choose to believe or not, 

raising babies is no simple task. 

It's no simple lifestyle. It's 100% selflessness and 100% sacrifice. 

They don't just become responsible, well-rounded adults 

because their sign says so.

Darn it.

But all while we try to be the parents we want to be, daily life happens and you feel like pure insanity.

It's making a complete fool of yourself in a store while you try to keep the baby happy and your toddler in the buggy. (Cart. Whatever.) You're trying to pay in line and your phone rings. You remember you had a coupon. Where the heck did it go... Your kid is carrying on a conversation with someone behind you, the baby just saw you reach in your purse and there was her bottle. She's hungry. She screams.

You're a lunatic. 

Life is crazy and life is good.

My husband made me laugh today when I told him

 I put a grand dent in my car.

It's the little things. The crazy days. The big whoops...

Tis' the season for the crazies.

With the easy days and the tough ones, 

 God created us to be dependent on Him. Always.

So, life is good. Life is wonderful because even in the middle of the chaos, it's our opportunity to call for Him. Through beautiful moments, truly difficult times, or even making a 

family scene in a store...even that. 

Even the tiny things take a toll after so long. 

It's called gray hair. 

The Crazy Month.

It's that season again!

That chilly, comfy, cozy, crazy season.

Thanksgiving holiday really got to me last week. 2013 is almost over, but that's fine by me. It's been an exciting, mostly exhausting year learning life with two babies and work, then shifting to no work at all, (which meant more work) life at home, and learning more about myself as these two grow. 

A few things I've learned as a mother of two little ones...

First, two it is. Two is the magical number for us. 

Two is perfect, and two is plenty.

I hope I'm not speaking too soon.

 Second, I'm a doer. I love crossing things off my lists.

 I love to get things done and keep moving. 

And guess what. You can't always do these things with two babies.

 You just can't.

Third, I love to work. I love that good feeling, I'm pleased with my long day kind of exhaustion. I miss it already. The long hours, the funny requests, the many jobs that a hairstylist can do. We cocktail products, formulate color, we're your therapists, 

(you're ours too, you know) and on and on. 

It's amazing.

I love what I do, and I love the company, too.

My heart was torn between my love for work and my life at home.

You know what? The way time is passing, these precious babies will be both be in school before I know it... and back to work it is.

 Life at home has been a blessing, and the hardest thing 

physically and emotionally I have ever done in my life.

It's only been 4 months.

I'm still pushing through, some days are wonderful and others are just not.

God gave each of us unique gifts...and all the gifts you need to be a stay at home mom, like patience and the gift of being still 

(whatever that may be called)... 

I'm definitely a work in progress.

My husband has been a saint through it all. I wouldn't know where to begin. He has the all the patience that I lack. When I go weak, he takes charge. 

He's my hero.

The month of December is wild, and within two years it's 

become even more of a big deal.

Christmas on the 25th, Marcy's 1st birthday on the 26th, New Years day right before Brady's 3rd birthday on the 6th. The smartest thing seems to pace myself... Christmas shopping, birthday shopping, 

decorating, planning, lists galore!

How is shopping going for y'all? I made my list today and I was surprised!

I've got a LOT more to do than I thought...

Cyber Monday is tomorrow, whatever that really is...maybe I can find a good deal here or there while I sit in my pajamas. Dragging two kiddos out to look for Christmas gifts just ain't happenin' friends...

Today was the first day of the last month of the year. I hope you all actually enjoy this month! The music, the company, the lights, the food & drinks, 

the parties...

it can get a little wild, but just enjoy.

Every day, I'm waiting on little Marcy to take her first step. 

Brady's ready to start school.

It's flying by friends.

Enjoy this happy season!

A Glance Forward.

I promised myself during the time change I'd make the most of my hours and choose to sleep longer. Looks like even when I get every opportunity to enjoy my rest, I find something to do, or in this case, think my way out of sleeping. This week, happy thoughts have been on my mind. For no new reason, just because. It's not the season (although this is my favorite), but a season that I can relate this to. 

God is definitely working in my life, I can feel it. 

The Bible study with the group of ladies I'm with is an unbelievable answer to prayer. These gals are amazing and I can already see how we're lifting each other up, and the lasting friendships that will come from our conversations. 

   This past week, I said said a prayer that I meant with my whole heart, but I was asking for something I wasn't even sure of...

God's blessed me tremendously and continues to bless this family daily.

So much, that after I prayed, I knew He heard me. I just felt it.

I'm excited and nervous with no idea what's in store for our family...

I prayed for God to use me. 

Few words, enormous request.

Sounds small, but no...

He listens, and He has big plans for our family, I know it. 

If you've opened your heart to understand that we cannot control life, you've definitely seen that He can work in mighty ways.

My favorite (from what I've learned from Ezer, the nature of a woman through relationships) is God working through friendships.

Friendships can do so much good for us, but unfortunately, I've learned...not everyone is beneficial to our lives. Which is a total bummer because I'd love to see everyone love each other, but some folks...God's teaching me something, that's all I can figure. My eyes have been opened to the beauty of blossoming new friendships, the healing of wounded relationships, and that sometimes cutting complete ties with others is the only option we have left. I truly hate that, honestly who wants that?

We are human, God is in control, and we were not made to understand everyone. 

As much as I'd love to.

I've felt bitter towards others, and prayed for a change of heart.

He will change your heart. 

But He will also open your eyes to things you need to see. 

It's not always the others who need to change folks...I have to remind myself of this daily...

God will work in your life if you let Him, ya know. 

He's surely used others to bring light to my life.

What a small and huge request that was. To ask to be used.

And having no idea what's in store for us...

Getting back to the basics here, that's the purpose we were created. 

He's blessed me with far too much,

 never failing His promises for me to become passive now.

Prayer and trust for what He has planned!

What's done is done.

I have so many things jumbled around in my 

head to say, and sorting it out seems like too much.

Have you ever been so busy with everyday life and doing, 

that by the time you get a moment of rest, a lightbulb goes off. 

You've become who you 

never thought you might be.

I've just recently started a bible study with a group of women, and this good thing just came in great timing. I can't say why, but the words I'm reading are so humbling and they're fitting like missing puzzle pieces into my life. How many women have gone through life with no definite direction, no definite calling, and painful effects of "trying to be it all"...as in taking responsibility to roles that we're not created to handle. I am so guilty. This study, in my eyes, may be different from another's, but it's opened my eyes wide to my calling. It's a study on Biblical Femininity. 

Click here to learn more.   

Beyond the study and how it's already completely "WOW'ed" me, I've unintentionally realized how my life has changed and who I've become. The first chapter of the study asked how you see femininity. 

Whether you lean towards feminism or traditionalism and the 

positivity and negativity that can come from both. 

Without a doubt, I lean towards traditionalism. 

After reading further, it's amazing what I've learned about myself. Especially in the areas I'm not expressing my own core capacities like God intended. And just like that, reading what God designed women to be, An Essential Counterpart, put so many misunderstood views of what I should be on a level perspective. The only one perspective that supplies true hope of life throughout humanity. 

Wow.

So that's that...this book is a treasure.

Learning more about myself through the everyday things as a mom is just plain funny.

Not sure if it came from watching my own mom play that role or if it's just how God designed me, but I truly do love to iron...seriously. I love to cook. I love to clean. I love staying home and being mom. I love this chapter of my life. And as this book calls it, "Season". 

I'm a traditionalist. I'm not sure I could've ever seen that coming. 

Funny though, you wake up and oh my goodness, you enjoy cleaning toilets... what in the world...

Regardless, I've learned, whether living from one end of the spectrum to another, 

God designed all women for one common calling. 

And what a deep comfort it is to know it's not up to ourselves to create our own lives, 

it's already done.

October Weekends.

October weekends are more than wonderful for the reason that we experience that hint of cool air, more outside play time, and we can dream of the days to come, full of love with 

family time, holidays, 

and the all around coziness of this season. 

Brian surprised Brady by a camp out last night...

He held both his pillows tight as he jumped and smiled his way out to the tent.

Yesterday, the kids and I threw out a 

blanket in the yard, and enjoyed this 

perfect late afternoon beauty. 

Brady roasted marshmallows, Brian showed me the right way to roast the perfect marshmallow and together, we sort of soaked up a special fall night together.

These special times together as a family mean so much to me.

We're still in our pajamas, I've started re-organizing the entire kitchen (it's a disaster) and...

I've got sauce on the stove, ready to make a 

baked spaghetti cheesy goodness to devour for lunch.

 It's Brady's favorite.

(and maybe one of mine, too.)

Books & Soups.

Right now, I'm celebrating that special time of day

 where I can sneak dipping 

Nutter Butter's into my coffee and 

not be caught by Brady. 

Both babies are sound asleep. The days where time works in my favor and I find them both fussy at the same time of afternoon, I know on the horizon, time for myself is waiting...

where I can finally relax. 

By the way, I have no idea how Nutter Butter's are in our pantry,

 I've never bought the things. 

Must have been my husband. Yesterday was one of those days, actually the second day in a row that I had not left my house. Those are the best kind of days. 

If I'm going to call myself a stay-at-home mom,

 I'm going to live up to it.

It hit me yesterday that between two bible studies, a book club, a new devotional, and a wonderful new book from a friend, what the heck am I doing while I should be reading?

So, that's my plan for the week to come. Reading, and lots of it.

I gathered up a bunch of ingredients that (thank the Lord) I had on hand to make dinner. Otherwise it would've been another breakfast-for-dinner meal. This soup was goooood. Perfect for yesterday because, now the norm, our temperature really can't make up it's mind. Since yesterday was pretty cool and fall is finally here, my favorite way to celebrate is to eat. So we did. 

Here's the recipe if you'd like...it's pretty easy and just real good.

Chicken Tortilla Soup

-ingredients-

4 cups chicken stock 

juice of 1 lime (1 1/2 to 2 tbsp)

1 can (14.5 oz diced tomatoes with juice

1/2 jalapeño pepper, finely chopped. (optional, but not really. Yum.)

1 can mild green chiles, undrained (4 oz)

2 tbsp chopped cilantro leaves

2 green onions, chopped (I used about 5)

I also added a little chopped red onion

3/4 cup corn, frozen, fresh or canned (drained)

1 cup cooked chicken (I let mine cook all day on low in the crockpot with chicken stock)

Shredded Monterey Jack or Mexican blend cheese to top off soup

Oh, and a little sour cream on top... We were out, and this soup would've loved that.

You can be real fancy and fry or bake your own tortilla strips. I'll be honest, I used left over tortilla chips we had from a cookout. Still good.

Simmer chicken stock with tomatoes, lime juice, jalapeño, green chiles, cilantro, green onion, and corn for one hour. The recipe I went by said to add chicken 5 minutes before done, but I let it simmer with the chicken for another 30 minutes at least. It'll be fantastic either way.

Don't forget to add a ton of cheese, a little sour cream, and tortilla chips on top!!

(and if you're like me, another couple green onions...)

So there ya have it. ENJOY! 

Maybe build a fire, throw on a comfy sweater and be thankful because this is the best time of year. 

My favorite from Martha.

Last week, I woke up to something so out of the ordinary. 

My husband was awake before anyone in the house

 and he had started a fire very early on a chilly morning.

Talk about a good morning. 

Coffee started, sweater thrown on... my morning was spectacular.

(Our mornings usually start with our toddler stepping on us and demanding a pop-tart.)

A special thanks to Martha Stewart for a pretty delicious "starter". 

Something to munch on. Something I tried a couple years ago and Oh. My. Goodness.

 Bothering with a difficult recipe isn't worth anyone's time.

 Unless it involves chocolate of some sort, then maybe. 

Here's a favorite little something I wanted to share.

 It does look like funny food, but the gals seemed to love it, and I think you might too. 

Goat cheese? Try it if you haven't!

Hope you enjoy this recipe...

I might think you're crazy if you don't.

Girlfriends.

Birthdays are special when friends you love 

take time to celebrate you.

 Seven of us took the night off from the everyday and ventured downtown to share a little lady time, a delicious dinner and a few drinks. I tasted a french rose sangria, friends, and it was to die for. I hope she doesn't mind me posting this...but this girl below... 

she's the one who rounded us up and planned the night. 

It meant more to me than I can say. 

The last stop of the night led us home 

with dozens of doughnuts and happy hearts.

Blew my diet because it was my birthday, and you're allowed to do that sort of thing.

This post is nothing more than a "thank you" to the girls who make my life special. To making my getaways something to look forward to. For play dates with the kids, for nights out, for double dates and husbands alike. For sharing ones own struggle, and for lifting each other up. For knowing help is just a ring away. For sharing funny stories, for the hilarious laughs...

For the memories made and exciting times ahead.

A girl just can't do without.

Birthday.

I asked Brian a few times throughout September 

"How old will I be?" 

First, because math to me is nearly impossible.

Second, because motherhood will leave you wondering what year it even is.

So, yesterday I think I turned 26 and spent the day surrounded by everything that will 

make a birthday happy.

Outside with my babies for most the day, visiting the pumpkin patch, 

and soaking up the beginnings of fall.

My day was made when Marcy learned to say "Uh Oh!"

 in the sweetest way possible. 

She's crawling, pulling up on things and now, and beginning to talk.

This my friends, is exactly the reason we're out of milk, bread and eggs...

because I rather spend time playing than load up two kids and waste a morning spending money.

 Brady J's personality.

Where could I even begin?

He truly believes he's an adult. When I tell him to do something, he shakes his finger at me saying "No ma'am..." going on with an explanation to why he doesn't need to do what I ask. Potty training is 85% complete. That's my math for the day. We're almost there. When I check on him using the potty, 

all he has to say is "Get out." 

So, I leave it up to the know-it-all. 

He's going to do big things in his life, that's all I know.

I couldn't be more proud of this confident, 

stubborn little smarty pants.

My birthday was so special. 

Ellie, Chris, Mom & Dad came to see me and that meant more to me than I can even explain. They each brought me a beautiful gift, a make-you-cry kind of birthday card, and big hugs. 

What more could I ask for? 

I love my family so much.

Of course every time I think about them and what they mean to me...the tears show up. God is just so good to us.

And guess what. Brian helped load up two monkeys so that the four of us could go out for my birthday.

 To eat Mexican food.

If you know my husband at all,

you know what a huge act of love this truly was. 

And I love him too, so SO very much.

And all you folks that wished me a "Happy Birthday!" with your kind words, thank you for making my day so wonderful!

Being Home.

Around the house, 

it's the time of year where playing outside is most comfortable, everything's a little more relaxed and it's hard for me to believe Brady J's upon his third year...

While Marcy sleeps her morning away, it's usually our special time together.

Of course, some mornings are wonderful, some become a nightmare... 

and some are just simply sweet.

I'm slowly learning stay-at-home mom life and so far all I have to report is that patience is key. 

I kind of figured that going into it, but the level of patience required is...well, I'm getting there.

What I've learned about my kids since I've been home is this:

-Brady wants to know what's ahead. I write down our agenda for the day and he's at ease...

he always wants to know what's next.

He's bossy. He taught me how to fish from his fort this morning. 

I never did it the right way, according to Brady.

-Marcy loves being home. 

She loves for us to sing to her. She loves to clap and dance.

...and she needs familiar surroundings constantly.

I took her to the mall the other day. She couldn't see me while I pushed her in her stroller.

But she faced everyone else in Greenville.

Big mistake.

So, to make life a little easier for us all, we've all become home-bodies.

I've always been this way. Brady always says "I love home" and Marcy is upset when we leave.

So, we stay.

Lilly's enjoying the time, too. The poor dog can't see, but chases her ball anyway.

Right now, Brady's sitting behind me in the chair and 

covering me with stickers.

We have nothing spectacular on our agenda for today, other than a grocery trip this afternoon.

And I love it.

You'll fall in love.

It was the week of dad's birthday, and I thought this might be

 -the- cake for him. 

So Brady and I got to work. Turned out pretty darn good.

Click Here for the delicious recipe!!

Of course, I used a bundt pan, and the icing, I'm a little ashamed to say...it was not homemade, in the least. I used (Betty Crocker, I think) buttercream frosting mixed with peanut butter. I cheated in a TERRIBLE sort of way on my diet. I basically inhaled the piece of cake. And it was so worth it. 

If you love chocolate, peanut butter, or any rich sweet in a major sort of way, this is for you.

...A very short post-worthy recipe you might want to try! Enjoy!!

Change is good and bread is not.

In the past week, things have been a little easier on me. I think God just gave me the patience I need or something, I can't put my finger on it...maybe I'm just adjusting to the change in scenery. 

I still know this is my calling, regardless of the difficult days. I did question it there for a second, if you want to know the truth. Change is good but change takes time. This applies to quite a few things our family is going through. Changes with income, though only slightly different, while we're grateful for opportunities that were made available. Change in our daily routine, because of the much longer hours Brian is working to support my new path. Change in the children's routine. We left the grocery store earlier today with half the customers knowing Brady tinkled in his pants. Because he told them so. Potty training is going pretty well. Marcy is on the move, crawling, not so much normally, but she gets around. Backward, sideways, she'll move. Brady doesn't nap like he used to.
That's scary altogether.

And becoming a stay-at-home mom, within the first week of becoming a nice little homemaker,
my yoga pants grew too small.
Homemade bread is truly a sin. 
Don't bother with it, it's just too good.

So now, alone, because truly I think my husband believes I'm crazy, I've lost ten pounds and I've got about the same to go. I haven't really had carbs going on my third week now, but I haven't even bothered exercising either. So now it's time to get back to that. 

It's now fall, which is exciting in itself, but fall makes me dream of food (like any other season, honestly) and well, I have to be a little more careful these days. Thankful for Pinterest and clean eating blogs, and all the good things the internet can be used for. 

They love each other, they really do.

Marcy's starting to mimic Brady's moves, which is another wild thought.

The look on his face explains a lot.

She's said "Da-Da", she cries what sounds like "Mama" and she loves to clap at everything.

She's just happy.

And he is too, and wanting to do everything...I mean everything, himself.

That came from his mama.

Marcy Lane 

is my angel, and I had no idea how I'd adore her.

A totally different love than for a son.

What it's like to know to the love for your son and your daughter.

To understand two different worlds of love. 

I've followed my calling.

Confidently, then no so much...

If I've learned one very important thing in my life...

 When your heart tugs you in one direction and deep down you know it would be so wrong to defy it, that's where you need to be. 

And so I'm here.

And blessings are here and more on the way.

The Chapter of Mom.

The blog. It's not forgotten. 

I've majorly underestimated the time I'd have free after two little ones on the go.

The "free" time I do have, it's devoted to being the housekeeper, cook, and finally when we see each other, the best wife I can be. Life with two is as wonderful as you make it to be. You can choose to see it as exhausting days (which they are) or you can choose to see each day as another blessed one to spend adoring your babies. That's also difficult on days where the only option you have is making the choice to stay afloat. I'm not sugar-coating life here, this is rough stuff. I knew this decision wasn't going to make life easier, but it would make mine right. 

Right for me. 

I'm a 25 year old stay-at-home mom of two little ones.

All you stay at home moms...with dreams of overachieving at this job, there's a child just wanting you to sing to her. To hold her. "Let's build a tower, mama." (I hear that one a lot.) 

I think this job is entirely different than I see with my eyes.

It's the most important kind of job. 

Last night, I read in my devotional,

"This is My desire for you: that you stay near to 

Me as you walk along your life-path."

This weekend, the boys headed out to camp together. 

They haven't made it home just yet, but my guess is that Brady ate entirely too many s'mores, I can only hope he brushed his teeth, and I hope Brian isn't ready to pull his hair out. 

I spent this magnificent weekend with the girls. 

Friday night, one of my dearest friends came by just to talk. We enjoyed plenty of popcorn and wine on the porch...the perfect beginning to a gorgeous weekend, don't you think?! The whole day Saturday I spent with mom. I never ever get to do this. We talked and talked and talked and I've missed her. We shopped all day, enjoyed Italian food, shopped some more. It was just good. And today, it's just me and my beautiful girl, soaking up what we can of a clean and quiet house. Resting while we can, watching movies and waiting to hug those boys again.

I've already learned that weekends really are for rest. I'm now doing the hardest work I know.

On top of being "mom", my mind is always wandering...

Here's what my mind is up to.

I've saved up a little money and bought a deep freezer. I've made 14 freezer meals so far and I'm smiling. Dinner is done. My crockpot is in for the wear and tear.

I've made two loaves of bread.

 And eaten them myself within a 5 day period. 

That stopped quickly when I couldn't fit into anything I own...

That was after I made this. Ladies, this is THE EASIEST thing to make. The center of the cake was swirled orange and purple, too... Just use the colors you want! I've had a few people ask me again for the recipe and here it is...

The Most Fun Cake Ever

One day I might open my eyes and say to myself "Morgan, you really need to stop loving food so much." but that's never going to happen, I can promise. Just to assure you, Marcy and I watched Julie & Julia this morning. I love food. My next venture is finding more recipes that are not so easy...Ones that I can feel a little more accomplished... that lean toward the healthy side. Is that possible? 

Delicious recipes are welcomed!! Please Share!

Away from the food...

I'm also starting a bible study and possibly a small group which I'm really interested in. These days are so consumed with the care of little ones, it's time I take care of myself. 

In a way that benefits myself in a positive way! I've got another very dear friend who has moved back to SC and sort of in perfect timing. I cant really explain, but I know how life gives you chapters, seasons, whatever you want to call it, and I'm moving on to my next one. 

And I'm just happy she's here to share it with me. 

She's someone I admire and truly look up to.

I thoroughly believe in letting the wrong things go and moving on with the right.

I've got some work to do, but it's time.

So, I'm excited to say, 

the page is turned and I'm beginning another chapter.

I really believe having a passion for everything you're doing is key to a happy life. 

Passion for those around you, everything you do, and everywhere you are.

I love being hairstylist.

I love being mom.

I love to cook.

...and who knows what's next...

In nine years, I met my handsome, we both started business life, had two babies, and now I'm doing something my whole heart believes in. 

It's just exciting, I'm not sure of a better word.

Hope you all have enjoyed this wonderful chilly weekend and 

you've all done something you love.

I'm back from my break!

I haven't let go of the blog love ladies (and maybe gents). It's just been one heck of a summer.

A great summer.

Just, you know, sometimes we need a break.

So here we are, mid July, stepping through rain puddles 

and watching our hair frizz in the humidity.

I feel like I've taken the summer "off" really. Not much happening around the house. Really, I don't have too much to report beyond two beautiful babies and an always exhausted mother who longs to be "me" again. Nothing against you men at all (because I know deep down we just couldn't do it without you) and this is not a complaint, but women go through a lot. Maybe men do too, but I can't speak for you guys. I have nothing to say beyond that regarding the subject, unless you know me personally 

and would love to join in on the pity party.

 I'll hush. 

Giving birth to two kids in two years...it's had its moments.

I'm almost done reading an amazing new book, too.

 I've joined a book club. 

Should have seen the look on my husbands face when I told him that. 

Yep, darling, you married a book lovin' nerd.

What's been pretty great though is hopping in bed 

around 8 o'clock with a book to read. 

That's been fantastic. 

I've basically got a month to go until I'm a full time stay at home mom.

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I could say it.

People, I would wear 5" heels to stand in for 

9 or 10 hours straight every day at work.

I hardly wear shoes at all anymore.

Like night and day. 

From heels to bare feet, through being one size to another, from makeup to a bare face, and skinny jeans to sweatpants 

(I hate to claim that one)...

the gal two years ago has become someone totally new.

 I've fallen in love with two angels.

 Two years ago, I had no idea how my world would be turned around. 

How quickly I would change, how my values would change...

that's just being a mom. 

Simple as that.

When you know who you are, and what you want, taking total care of two children 24/7 can be tough. I would never say they're holding me back... they're just along for the ride! They're my sidekicks.

Life as a mom is one heck of a ride. 

When you want to give the whole world to your children, at times it can feel like you've got the world on your shoulders.

 Again, that's being a mom.

I could go on for hours with the ups and downs. 

If we're all honest here, there's plenty of both.

It's just mastering enjoyment of the ups and the lessons from the downs. 

And planning an night out for goodness sake.

Let me have a moment.

                    

I'm blogging from the iPad again. Computer screen still won't turn on, I'm sure it was Brady's doings. 

In May of 2010, when we first found out we were expecting a baby, I had dreams of a little curly-haired wild boy. I wanted stories to tell, adventures to share and hilarious moments with him...

God gave me exactly what I wanted in this family. Plus more. Like...way more...

I'm taking my anxiety out on a bag of M&M's (These are Brady's potty training treats. Or...Were.) and a really tacky bright green mommy drink I grabbed out of desperation while at the store with the babies yesterday. My body hurts. My brain hurts. God must think I'm some sort of superhero. 
Could be punishment, too. 

Yesterday began with a trip to the ER for Brady. 

Thank goodness all is well, but that was only the beginning. 

After we returned home, Brady found the dog treats and emptied them out for Lilly to eat as fast as she could. 

She was sick all night.

This morning, Brady stripped down to nothing while running around the house with a pop-tart in hand. Next thing we know, he's using the potty
everywhere but the potty.

And laughing hysterically of course.

I. Am. Tired.

I'm exhausted. 

And someone had the nerve to tell me "...just wait 'till he turns three."

I have nothing left to say other than bless your sweet souls, mama's.

Time's A Changin'.

Being June 2nd, I've started blog posts about five times since my last post, with so so much on my mind, so much to say, and so much ahead of me. All that's on my mind is only a million times thought over. A jumble of emotions, except for one. Which I'd like to not claim, but fear, which is usually one. I'm always the planner, the one with it all figured out. Only lately with life bringing one thing after another (some wonderful and some not so much), it's seemed that my decision to become a stay at home mother has happened right on time. My love for my work is something I'll never let go of. But my love for my children will always come before work, and before money. This short period of beautiful time in my life I want to make all that I can.

Here are some amazing things that have happened in my life lately...

-A relationship that was once broken has now been restored. 

A weight has been lifted. What a beautiful thing.

-My sister is close again. She's happy, and we've been having an absolute blast together.

-Yesterday, we had a yard sale to grab a little extra cash...

Made more than we hoped for, met a new neighborhood couple, and I watched my grandmother play with both my babies.

-Just the right doors have been opened, and just the right ones closed for our 'brand new' life ahead.

I could dance. I could sing. So many weights have been lifted.

Nothing huge has even happened, but I've found this peace I can't even explain.

Our life ahead isn't like what we've been living. Or atleast that's not what I expect. 

Our yard sale was a tiny start. My car is for sale. We're cutting back majorly, and wanna hear something wild? I feel like we've won the lottery. When you make the decision to cut back by putting priorities in order...you don't and won't miss a darn thing. Really, it's not crazy.  

It's our life.

It'll be worth every shiny penny we cut back on.

Just the other day, a sweet friend of mine stopped by to catch some pictures of myself with the kids.

Actually, she's the most wonderful photographer ever, that girl.

I was in a frenzy, not a darn thing in my closet that fits well. Marcy Lane is five months old, and well, baby weight is a tough subject for any mom. 

I made it through 6 days of my 10 day cleanse. By the fourth day, I had already lost five lbs. By day #7, I'd almost withered away from missing my Reese's and craving a margarita.

Hey, I did better than expected.

It was a surprisingly easy cleanse to follow, 

I felt unbelieveably clean of everything I eat on a daily basis. 

For the photo session, dad let me borrow his shutters he was in the middle of painting...

Random, yes, but the perfect prop!

I can't wait to see how they turned out... 

                                     

             On this rainy Sunday, the four of us stayed in. We had the laziest of days,but I've enjoyed      every second with them. (Except for the few tantrums thrown.) Marcy's growing so fast, but we're enjoying it! She's been laughing and playing so much more. Brady's been playing the entertainer...which is adorable and scary at the same time. Brian and I have become a strong team towards these babies. While Marcy does no wrong, being the perfect little angel she is, Brady has tested us constantly, while we hold back our laughs or turn our heads, or walk away so we don't lose it completely with him... He's a wild man...and he knows how it all works now. And we're potty training. And I hear Brian snoring now on Brady's monitor ...between work, staying up working on the house, and chasing this crazy child around, I figured he'd be out early... 

    

   What a wild life that comes with children. But how beautiful to see God unfold a plan for us right before our eyes. Something I could never dream of myself. A gift that we're given as a family tiny pieces at a time. I was rocking Marcy to sleep last night when she looked up at my face. Right into my eyes and I smiled at her, just so thankful for a peaceful moment with my girl...she smiled the biggest smile right back at me, and giggled the sweetest sound. It was a moment only a mother understands, and of course I had that wonderful feeling....God is all around our family. What beautiful blessings He gives us daily. The amount of love I could have for these children I couldn't have ever imagined. Of course the tears came, and my gratitude for this life has grown to become even greater. I'm so excited for the journey ahead as a family of four. The most exciting part is that I've given up planning our life myself. Why do we bother? There are too many precious moments to be lived that we cannot and will not ever be able to create ourselves.

                                   Letting go and living life is where my heart is.